all of the actual shooting is also included, since it took under 3 minutes! we were able to use kristis camera to record us as i photographed her using my camera. sneeeeeaky! :P i also recently made a question and answer video, which can also be found on my youtube channel.
ive been wanting to make this piece for a while now, and i knew going into it that this image was going to be one of the finest lines i have walked across when it comes to marrying darkness with beauty. especially knowing what this truly represents to me. but after shooting this, i personally feel both relieved and proud.
more and more these days, it seems that my photography is really becoming a way for me to represent sadness in a beautiful ways. dealing with depression for 5 years has certainly influenced me, and my life - even though its allowed me to find an extreme level of happiness in my adulthood, i cant forget what it was like when things were different. so, as dreary and perhaps unwanted it is to look at this topic, this photograph is really a summary of the journey i went through growing up. i went from being a child - carefree and blissfully ignorant at one point or another - to a young girl who at her lowest was suicidal. you dont see it coming - its a slow process but all of a sudden youve hit rock bottom and you feel there is nothing left to you. all of a sudden everything that was easy, isnt. its hard to wake up. its hard to fall alseep. its hard to eat. in summary, this image is a suicide. unlike most of my characters, this one has given up. and much like i did, she needs someone else to save her.
but the thing is, without pain there is no happiness - and i feel completely blessed to have been through what ive gone through. i know what true happiness is, and now that i have it, ill never let go. ill never disappear. when i look at this picture i can see this character finish her death, and in that moment its like that piece of me is gone for good - though im guessing it will never be completely gone from my pictures. :P
on a technical note, the skeleton was created by using images of skeletons for reference, and painting over the images with varying colors, opacities, and brush sizes through several different layers. i also made a lot of decisions with this photo that i feel i normally wouldnt make, but regardless, i like the outcome. :)